So, I’m broke. Well, not exactly. But the money I allot myself every week for crazy things like soy chai lattes, fake nails, and colonics…seems to have disappeared like Jimmy Hoffa. O well. Sunny and I made our way into the city to get a few groceries, and I was feelin a tad sorry for myself that I wouldn’t be able to get my weekly of fix of sushi, miso soup, and seaweed salad at my favoritest little restaurant. I will be telling you more about this enchanting place soon, because it’s fast become something I need to put under the heading of: Things that make me happy to be alive.
The owners are a couple that have just moved here from California. Apart from the fact that they make the best sushi I have EVER tasted, they are two of the sweetest people you’ll ever know. They truly want you to be happy. I get the feeling they pour all their kindness, love, and sweetness into their food. And you can taste it. Plus, they remind me of a doting grandma who isn’t happy until they think you’ve eaten enough. If I just order one thing..they insist on giving me one of my other favorites. I can’t be rude..so I smile and say thank you:)
But no smiling couple today. Cuz I am broke. Or AM I??? As I rummage around in my CD holder in my visor for my Carla Bruni CD…BAM. Seven wrinkled up and crunched dollar bills fall out from behind the CD. Evidently, during one of my more prosperous weeks, I stored up a few extra bills like a squirrel does nuts for winter. Happy Days are here again! As we come off the interstate, and sit at the light, I spy a homeless man hunched over a worn cardboard sign that I can barely make out. Something about heading north, and needing money. My dreams of sushi and miso soup swam before my eyes…but as I got closer, I knew that $7 fell out for him, not me.
I pulled up and rolled down my window. He seemed disbelieving as walked toward my van. “I’m sorry, it’s not a lot, but I hope it can help you”, I said. I looked right into his eyes, and was shocked to see how blue they were. His face broke into a shy grin. “Thank you so much. I’ve had some hard times. I really appreciate this“, he replied genuinely as he took the bedraggled bills from my outstretched fingers.
Today is one of my favorite gifts thus far. Maybe because, usually I pretend I don’t see these kinds of people. Or, if I do, I give the money without a word, without making eye contact. When I gave the money today, it felt like I was sacrificing something I’ve come to take for granted. I talked to the man today, tried to send grace to him through my eyes and words. I gave him that money, and as small an amount as it was, it was my spending cash for the week. And it’s only Monday.
I say this not to make myself seem like Mother Theresa, but to say…today felt different from other times when I’ve given a few dollars, but still had $20 more in my purse. You know? This was a good day. I’m so fortunate. Always have been, and I truly believe every time we give to those who have fallen upon bad luck, we are becoming the God/Spirit/angels we pray to. We are their hands, eyes, and voice in that moment.
There’s magic in giving, no doubt about it. I picture it like a stream that you can either step into, or stay on the side and watch. In this giving project, It’s as though I’m jumping into the stream, and it’s hard to describe how it feels. Magic is the best word I’ve come up with yet. ♥