True happyness: the final frontier? I just said that in the voice of Captain Kirk. I kinda think so. We’ve figured out alot of things..but Happyness proves to be the one thing we don’t have down to a science. Yesterday’s post, 29 gifts, linked happyness..to giving. At first, that probably seems a tad backward. But the farther down the lane I get on this, it seems like Zac Brown might really be right when he says..You get what you give . if you don’t know Zac Brown, he’s a really cool dude that usually wears a stocking cap and was just livin life..and doin his thing till Jimmy Buffett discovered him. He writes songs about lovin his chicken fried, cold beer on Friday night, and a pair of jeans that fit just right. This guy’s got it figured out.
It must be said…I am no expert. I have spent my share of dark days holed up in my mini van on a dirt road consuming diet coke straight up. But…I have some tried and true tricks that get me back into the sun. I call my Mom. I go workout. Or I listen to Zac sing about fried chicken. And I have one more trick up my sleeve. Her name is Mary, and you can find her at http://yourjoyfulwedding.com/ She is my dear friend that wears many hats…all of them fabulous. Mary has mastered the art of mothering, life coaching, and ceremony planning. I will be talking about her a lot in my posts, because her gentle guidance in my life has been one of the most beautiful gems of grace I’ve ever been given.
Not long after I began talking with Mary, I quickly learned that I would be doing homework. If I wanted things in my life to change, I couldn’t just sit around and talk about the problems. That’s certainly part of what I had to do initially. But with Mary….there was no dwelling. There was talking..identifying..and then homework. But no dwelling. This is what I love about the whole business of life coaching. It’s exactly that. Someone coaching you through a difficult problem….helping you to learn how to fix it for yourself.
My first assignment was to keep a gratitude journal. Every night, I had to write down a number of things I was grateful for. When I first started, it seemed hard. I had gratitude block. Cuz
I was being a spoiled brat I was in that place..where all I could see was the unpleasant stuff. But, I stuck with it, because all I knew was…there was something about Mary. by the way..Something about Mary is also a really awesome movie..but has nothing to do with this post I wanted what she had. Her face glowed. She seemed to handle every little hardship in her life with ease and skill. I was inspired by the way she treasured and respected her children as individual people, and couldn’t help but notice the deep friendship she shared with her husband. I watched in wonder as she created TWO thriving businesses…both as imaginative and wonderful as one could imagine.
And as I kept to my homework…I started noticing more things throughout the day..to be grateful for. Pretty soon, I was writing in the margins. One page a day could not contain all the things I was thankful for. My gaze had shifted from seeing all the wrong…to noticing all the beautiful. It was always there, I just couldn’t…wouldn’t…didn’t…see it.
So..to recap: Keys to happyness
- Untangling stressful thoughts with Byron Katie’s questions
- Giving to others
- Staying in the present moment
- Being grateful for what you have, and taking notes
- Contact my friend Mary Maisey Ireland ( THAT would be a gift to YOURSELF)
- Listening to Zac sing about cheat meals on a Friday night
I’ll leave you with this quote from Meister Eckhart: If the only prayer you ever say in your whole life is “thank you,” that would suffice.